You're holding me in your arms
And I feel like I'm slipping away
I want to be with you forever
But they keep tearing us apart
I wish I could be with you
With you in the world and free
But the world is not with me now
All its cards are stacked against me
I treasure the falling of autumn leaves
I treasure the hair across your back
I treasure the light of God's Presence
Lighting up a dark room before me
His Ways are unfathomable even now
Somehow I cannot bear to do this to myself
Something about a butterfly flying far and free
Something about how a person can struggle so hard
Only to cut themselves off their own feet
I cannot leave this world because it's wrong
And so I come bringing you leaves
Oh God your purposes greater than mine
My love holds me hard in his arms
Keep kicking, keep swimming, I think
I want for him to fly away so far and fast
I refuse to take my own life
Because of the pink fire from a moonstone glow
That which kills shall not kill me
And we will inherit tragedy
Oh home without a home oh homeless one
I know somehow everything will be okay
In Jesus' Name,
Amen